Liveblogging the stash - BEA 2011

Wandering the convention floor and gladhanding the entire kidlit industry at Book Expo is fun and all that, but the best part for me is when my kids arrive, and I get to collect their reactions to the exciting books (and swag!) that I have rounded up for potential review.

 

Mao: What's this? A Heroes of Olympus medallion? Cool! Did you meet Rick Riordan?

Your Neighborhood Librarian: He wasn't there today... but we could get up at like 6 tomorrow and go down to the convention center and get a ticket so that we can come back to the convention center at 1:30 and stand in line for an hour and get him to sign a book. Wanna?

Mao: Nnnneh.

YNL: How was your drive up with Daddy?

Zhou: It was fine. I made you this art:

 

Zhou: That's the commander guy, and a ninja, and a cyclops with a chain saw. And three little soldier guys on the end. [NOTE: If anyone ever questions my credentials for evaluating boy books, I am going to point to the cyclops with a chain saw that Zhou made out of crap he found on the floor of the minivan.] Oh and we listened to books on CD. We finished Closed for the Season.

YNL: Surprise ending?

Mao: Moderate surprise.

 

YNL: Ok what else is in the sack?

 

Zhou: Why We Broke Up? That doesn't sound like it's for me.

YNL: Daniel Handler is the real name of Lemony Snicket.

Zhou: Still.

YNL: No, yeah, you're absolutely right. Not for you. I was just mentioning.

Mao: I liked The Beatrice Letters.

YNL: I'm sure he'll be happy to hear that.

 

Mao: Variant? "Trust no one?" Excellent!

Zhou: Mustache!? What's this?

Mao: [reading inscription] "For John Waters." John Waters? Our friend John Waters?

YNL: Well, one of our friends John Waters. The one with the mustache.

Zhou: Mao, go find your own book, I'm reading Mustache.

Mao: YES! VAMPIRE WEENIES!

YNL: Mr. Lubar said that some of those stories are a little scary.

 

Mao: [already reading] ... mmm-hmm... ok...

 

[dead silence for a while]

Mao: Cool! He's a mime, and then somebody got bitten by him, and he realized he was a vampire. That's awesome!

YNL: Seriously? A mime vampire? That's like a Jar Jar Binks vampire.

Bob: A Robert Mugabe vampire.

YNL: A house caterpillar vampire.

Mao: You guys...

YNL: Zhou, you finished with that picture book? There's more in this sack you'll like.

 

Zhou: Wait, I just want to look at the pictures again. Mao, look at this, "Slides should not explode." I love how long his beard is. It has stripes too.

Mao: Very nice. Can I read it now?

Zhou: Sure! [back to the bag] Aww, nice! Mao look, a Hellboy mask! [Dark Horse swag]

Bob: Put it on, I want to see that.

 

Mao: Oh man! That's Hellboy done in The Amazing Screw-on Head style.

YNL: Mao did I tell you that the same artist did Hellboy and Screw-on Head?

Mao: Really?

YNL: I didn't?

Mao: Hellboy was a comic book?

[Yikes. He's what, nine? and he knows Mike Mignola's style by sight? Why haven't I been taking him to museums all this time - he could know the difference between Velasquez and Delacroix by now! If he's going to be precocious, why haven't I groomed him to be precocious in a way that might win him scholarship money?! One more example of poor planning on our part. We are bad, bad parents. Who really, really enjoy sharing comics with our kids.]

Zhou: Super Diaper Baby and the Invasion of the Potty Snatchers?! Thanks Mom!

[Bad, bad parents.]

Bob: Is this like xmas morning, having all these books here?

Mao: Pretty much!

Mao: The Orphan of Awkward Falls. Pretty good sounding. I'm going to read the back.

YNL: So...?

Mao: I read the back and I think it might not be my style. There's a boy genius, but he sounds kind of snotty.

Bob: Wouldn't you be?

Mao: Well, I'll give it more of a look later, but for now I'm going to move on.

Zhou: Hey! The evil lair of the big bad guy in Super Diaper Baby is in Cleveland!

Bob: That's atrocious! Didn't they get the memo? Cleveland is a paradise on earth, full of flowers, and people singing!

YNL: And sports teams that aren't worth a damn.

Bob: Well honey the place did go a bit downhill after I left.

YNL: In 1983.

YNL: Oh! Guys, look what I got you!

 

Mao: Cute! Sweet! "You have failed me for the last..." Wait a minute...!

 

 

Mao: WHAAT? Is there going to be The Strange Case of Origami Darth Vader??? Did you bring it?

YNL: It'll be called Darth Paper Strikes Back, and hold your horses, it's not out til August. The author, Tom Angleberger, was there signing Horton Halfpott.

Zhou: I love that book! I have it in the car!

YNL: I told him that, baby.

Mao: I've invented a new holiday. It's Bookmas. Happy Bookmas today!

Happy Bookmas, everyone.

Comments

[David Lubar]

Tell Zhou that Ninja Weenies are next. (Great minds...)